Im at strip club and am horny
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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