Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize