She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
