You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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