Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
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