I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
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