it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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