I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
