I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
