just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
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