Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
where are my eyebrows?
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