i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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