so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
