I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize