it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
The feeling are messing with the penis
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
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