She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize
