We're like a lot better than the average bears
My sheets look like a crime scene.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize
