Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
