that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
My ass is underappreciated
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
