Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
