Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Go christen that room with your naked body.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
