I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
