Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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