I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize