Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
wanna go halves on a baby?
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
