I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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