I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize
