I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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