I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
