2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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