its not stalking. its research.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
