And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
