1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Randomize