either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
