I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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