okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
