Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Randomize
