I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I'm passing your future prison.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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