God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize
