Sry I called you an 8
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
