Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
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