i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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