YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
