need another drink. this is the easiest way
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
