I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
