i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
