Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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