YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
