You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize