I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
